another place to hold
silence, stillness
away from this
jagged edgeless
world of thoughts that
never lie down and die

I rebuild the process
without your hand
make these things mine
in hopes to stand
(tall,
not to fall)

-

if i tell myself it doesn’t hurt
it shouldn’t

-

hearing your voice on tape
recorded so far back
when things were happy
brings me closer to the farther away
shows me everywhere i went wrong
and how you must have hated me
then
for needing you SO much
and how now you don’t know what to
feel
when i look past my tears into your
eyes
saying, “everything can change…
all i want
is for things to be
the same”

-

So long ago i became Me of Me & You
that now i cannot find myself
while you never really lost yourself in Us
and just existed as You accompanied by Me

-

my thought wheels spin beyond reason
i ache to have your arms around me
you lie next to me, indifferent in sleep
i keep the watch of the rising sun
hoping soon to find peace
to stop these electric pulses
which hold me from sleep
to stay this fear
which racks my body

shivering
scared by ghosts of thoughts
would wake you
but would feel ashamed
grown men should not be haunted
by words
should not be kept awake
by anxiety and loneliness

-

never having had choice before
what was made may not be wise
a simple utterance of instinct
an attempt to relive these things
to find myself within you again
but at what cost?
at whose expense?

everyones…

-

sleeping beside me
goddess of night unfolds her thoughts
in complacent sighs she whispers eternities
i lay beside her and wait ’til day
brings her about again to talk to
to laugh with

but for now she has regained her innocence

-

as the silence lays between us
like a stillborn child
we created in our
twisted copulation
we both regret our actions
not yet committed

-

hide inside,
try not to wonder
slide on by,
world torn asunder
hold the ground
to keep from drifting
kill the sound
now souls are shifting

-

pressure changes
vision strays from focus
fluctuation, blur and bend
floating soul, can’t touch
the ground
internal waves pixelate
towards edges
where they dissipate

i swear, it feels like
the end of the world

-

withdrawn
without hope of
wonder
withered words
woebegone
waiting while
weeping

-

folding things back
upon themselves
we find a shorter path of travel
a way to connect
without the cause of effect
the Kronal Ojeckal demon slain
we walk through the invisible gates
of eternal light to come out
- indeterminate spacial
occupation, half in the
pool of flesh . . . remainder
still floating on thoughts
of greater nothing, still
burning in ‘void of form’,
blissful slow burn

at night i lay awake in fear that
i have broken this precious gift,
your trust, into pieces too small
to reassemble

-

momentary flux
ascension kills
gravity’s weight
shreds astral skin

my sun is gone
no more to pierce the clouds
celestial drifting
breaks the fabric
of my certainty

can’t see
or feel the warmth
on my cheek
cold biting tender skin
emotionally frozen
frigid
frostbitten
feelings forgotten

finally

forever